"Let's stop calling Trump voters idiots and fools, and call them what they are: fucking drug addicts," Bill Maher told his Real Time audience on Friday night, noting that the 14 states with the most painkiller prescriptions per capita all voted for Donald Trump.

Maher built on his point, noting that the counties in Ohio and Pennsylvania that flipped from majority Barack Obama to a majority of Trump voters are plagued by heroin abuse.

"West Virginia was Trump's best state, and in the past six years folks there have downed 780 million hydro- and oxycodone pills. That's 433 pain pills for every person in the state. West Virginia's mascot is a dilated pupil," Maher added.

It's a role-reversal. Usually liberals are the ones being accused of abusing drugs. But, as Maher points out: "Who's stoned all the time now? Not us. We've moved on to kale smoothies and an occasional craft beer. Meanwhile, you've got meth mouth and are taking your dog's arthritis pills."

So, take some expert advice from Maher, who points out, "If there's one thing I know, it's how to manage a high... Please, we liberals invented stoned!"

Some quick tips from the master:

  • Don't mix drugs and alcohol. But if you do, oxycodone goes with white wine; hydrocodone goes with red.
  • Don't drive on pills. Call Uber or Lyft and have someone on pills drive you.
  • Always have a wingman: someone to say cool it, or don't drive, or don't put that in your mouth. Woody Harrelson once pulled me away from a long conversation with a Christmas tree I swore was Elton John.
  • You're doing the wrong drugs. Stick to the stuff that comes out of the ground. Ninety percent of you are famers!